I am catching up with posting online my articles.
So I am tired now and I do not know what to write again. But there is a "some kind of" new realization. I call realization but in reality it is still difficult for me to classify or define it. Anyway I will make a note of it in this article and I will see later if that is important in my process.
So I am tired. And I so not know what to write. I seat in front of the computer but there is nothing really that I could write about. So I lie down in my bed and I try to see if I can get any idea while having a little more comfortable position in my bed. And I notice that there are some thoughts or ideas circulating in my head but they are not clear. It is as if they were coming to the surface of my awareness but I cannot see them with clarity because they are still too far away. So it seems as if they were coming up from the depths of myself but they come to the surface only for a short moment and they dive back again. And so I do not have the clarity of what I want to write.
As I said I do not know how to classify it and I do not know whether this is something important. But at the same time I have reached certain point of self trust in my process and thus I do not want to discard it just because it is something that it cannot be touched or referenced to experiences of other people. So I make a note of it and I will let it be. And I will see later in time whether this is something important.
The reason why I do not want to discard it so easy is because I have another experience which is in a way similar. It cannot be touched and it cannot be scientifically proven but it is here within me. And it has happened already few times. It all happens especially in the moments when I am tired and all that I want to do is to lie down in my bed and sleep or at least do nothing. But I cannot do it because I have to write my JTL ( Journey To Life ) article. And in those moments it seems as if "something" was screaming inside of me. There is no physical sound and thus it cannot be proven scientifically but yet "something" or "somebody" screams inside of me.
Am I getting crazy ?
Well... it really depends. I know that there are many people who would say so. But this is also because they live only on their surface of their ego and they never dare to challenge the so called "reality". And thus for them anything that cannot be proven by the science is unreal. But on the other hand if you search, investigate and work with yourself then you know that there are moments when you walk forward on a new path with your eyes blinded and you cannot say and classify immediately what is happening to you and with you. You need some time to comprehend it.
So I will leave it here and I will see with the time if this is something important in my process.