This is the continuation of the previous article:

YOU ARE MY FRIEND AND YOU SHOULD ACCEPT ME THE WAY I AM - PART 1
YOU ARE MY FRIEND AND YOU SHOULD ACCEPT ME THE WAY I AM - PART 2

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe that shouting in anger is something normal and justifiable; within this I forgive myself that I have not allowed myself to realize that I have allowed the abuse to happen too often and I have accepted and allowed myself to believe that this is normal and new standard of normality.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to justify my shouting in anger as a consequence of others pissing me off; within this I forgive myself that I have not allowed myself to realize that I use the justification as an element of diverting my attention of myself and instead of investigating why I do it I accept that this is responsibility of somebody else and I don't have to do anything about it.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe that my shouting in anger is just my way of expressing myself in a passionate way; within this I forgive myself that I have not allowed myself to realize that I am using beautiful words to suppress and cover up the abuse so that I don't have to look at myself and investigate what I have created and allowed.

I forgive myself that I have not allowed myself to realize that shouting in anger is another form of abuse and no matter what kind of justification and reasons I have it will always stay as an abuse; all my justification/reasons and explanations will make me feel better about myself and make me believe that I am innocent.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe that shouting in anger is the only option when dealing with other people who piss me off and don't understand my point of view; within this I forgive myself that I have not allowed myself to realize that I have accepted and allowed myself to limit myself with this belief and not investigate other possibilities and options.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to shout in anger at those who are not capable of punishing/hurting/abusing me back ( children and others physically weaker then me ); within this I forgive myself that I have not allowed myself to realize that I allow the abuse within myself but I find an excuse which justifies it by blaming others for it and I continue with the abuse instead of investigating why I do it.