I forgive myself that I have not allowed myself to realize that all my excuses is just a sign that I don't want to stop my addiction; and it is all just to make myself feel better because of the guilt that I feel that I don't stop it now in the moment and I let myself to further fall into it.

I forgive myself that I have not allowed myself to realize that my excuse will make me feel temporarily better but sooner or later the feeling of guilt will come back and then to suppress, forget and numb this feeling I will take more of the substance and this way I will fall more into addiction.

I forgive myself that I have not allowed myself to realize that none of the substances ( alcohol, drugs, sex ) is addictive; the only addiction exists in my mind and blaming different substances as addictive is another way to run away from facing the real cause of addiction which is inside of me.

I forgive myself that I have not allowed myself to realize that I am fully responsible for my addiction and thus I am the only one who can change it and stop it; the only right moment to stop my addiction is now in this moment and because every excuse postpones it into the future - which is not now - thus I will always fail with it.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe that my addiction is fun instead of realizing that it is just another excuse to make myself feel better and suppress the guilt that I don't stop it.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to blame others for my addiction instead of realizing that this is just another excuse to not face the reality that I am fully responsible for it myself.